This sounds like a boring read, but it's actually mildly entertaining and really helpful for determining if you need a microphone or two for your ceremony. And if you think I'm done with the dumb portmanteaus, you clearly don't know me very well at all. 

My love of that silly convention of mine aside, let's begin with the simplest and most important question of all.

Wait - Do We Even Need One?

I'm a really loud guy. Not to brag, but I'm routinely told by people well past the last row of attendees that, when speaking aloud without a microphone, they could hear every word I said clearly. Obviously, I'm not the only one speaking at a ceremony - at a minimum, you two will also be speaking. Here's what you'll be saying:

  • the words "I will" when I ask you the questions of intent
  • the line-by-line repetition of your vows, or the reading of your pre-written vows directly to each other
  • repeating three brief lines after me while you exchange rings

If you choose to repeat vows (even they can't quite hear what you're repeating, they'll obviously know what you're saying) or if you're confident everyone will hear your self-written vows, there may be no need for a mic at all, depending on:

  • How much ambient noise we're dealing with outdoors. AC units, generators, fountains, fast-moving rivers or waterfalls, birds, cicadas, passing trains, low-flying airplanes, wind, road noise... the more of these there are, and the greater their respective volumes, the more likely it is that you'll need one. If you're not sure, I recommend having one on standby with your DJ. Or...
  • How the acoustics are in the room we're in. Where we have relative silence for indoor ceremonies, we must consider the acoustics of the space itself. Low ceilings, high ceilings, certain building materials like brick or glass, or the sound of a nearby AC unit or loud outdoor generator can all make it hard to hear.
  • How many guests there are, how their seats are arranged, and where we are in relation to them. Some spaces are narrow, which require many short rows of seats that make it tough for sound to reach the back rows. Others may have fixed stages or fixed seating, which may simply be arranged far away from each other. (A good example would be an old theater where the first row begins many feet past a relatively high stage, where the orchestra pit is.) Situations like these demand a microphone almost invariably. Now imagine the opposite - an easily pliable setup like a concrete patio or open field and folding chairs. Simply setting up the chairs comfortably close to the ceremony space, moving your back few rows to the end of your remaining rows, or arranging your rows in semicircle will all help obviate the need for a microphone.


If, after considering all of the above, you decide that a microphone is a necessity, let me get my mic stand rant out of the way first.

Miss Me With That Stand, Man!

There are countless commonplace events where mics on stands are just fine - a concert, a comedy club, bingo in the church hall basement, or a bar on karaoke night. Here's why they absolutely suck at wedding ceremonies.

  • They're ugly as homemade sin. There's just no getting around it - microphones on stands look like garbage in your ceremony photos. You've gone through so much hard work to make that space look great - expensive dresses, fancy suits, floral arrangements, expert hair and makeup, perhaps some epic view behind it all... why m
  • They ruin your photos. The stand's inherent ugliness aside, the microphone itself often gets in the way of photos. And yes, your photographer could, in theory, edit it out of some photos, but most will simply leave it in. Even if you fix the photos, your guests will still see it and be subject to its hideousness.
  • It means we're literally gathered around a stick. It's hard to explain why, but having a microphone on a stand directly between me and the two of you dampens the feeling of intimacy that I'm trying to cultivate.
  • They bring in a shred of the vibe from those commonplace events I mentioned above. This will naturally clash with the classy, timeless vibe I'm sure you're looking for.

Also, mic stands are usually made of uranium. Or asbestos. Or lead. Just trust me on this, don't Google it or anything. You're busy planning a wedding.

Microphone Setups, From Best To Worst

  1. No microphones at all. Use microphones only if they're needed because of a funny venue layout or too much ambient noise.
  2. A single lavalier for me. This is when there are no other speakers and the couple is repeating vows line by line after me.
  3. A single lavalier for me, and a single "free range handheld" for other speakers. Readers would hold onto the microphone until it's time for their reading, then distribute it to the next person who would need it (including the bride and groom if necessary.) If there are no readers and the handheld is simply needed for the couple to read pre-written vows, we'll appoint a "mic buddy" in the front row to hand it to the first person saying vows, who then hands it to their partner when they're finished, who then hands it back to our appointed buddy.
  4. A single lavalier for me, and a single handheld on a stand for other speakers. While it still looks ugly in the photos it does appear in, it will only show up in a fraction of your ceremony photos, and none of those will be the photos of the three of us. 

There is a Fifth Option...

It's either love or aether. No, wait. I'm thinking of something else.

Handheld microphones are a mainstay of the DJ's toolkit, and the DJ's main purview is the reception. Since handheld mics are not an eyesore at a reception like they are at a ceremony, they'll all have one. Sometimes, a single handheld is all they've brought with them, and a nearby ambient sound source (think giant nearby fountain, busy nearby highway, or loud nearby waterfall) demands one, there's one last resort. It's imperfect but elegant enough to work in the circumstances. It's known by a million names, but I call it a miclace (rhymes with Mikeless!) - a microwaveable shoelace. Sorry, a microphone necklace.

This device eliminates the need for a mic stand by making me the stand. There's a rigid metal ring tucked into a thin adjustable sleeve that holds the microphone around my neck, resting directly on my chest under my chin, like so:

PHOTOS GO HERE. BE PATIENT.

Then I write some sort of outro here. Did I mention I'm not finished writing this page yet?

A Word of Warning to the DIY Crowd

I do a fair share of DIY ceremonies that include a friend or relative, of varying degrees of competency, playing processional and recessional songs on a Bluetooth speaker from a phone in lieu of hiring a DJ. The same couples sometimes purchase their own lavalier microphone and receiver/speaker combo and use this for the ceremony, and every one has been a problem. At best, they sound terrible - at worst, they cut out, stop working mid-ceremony, or don't work at all. There's a reason that PA system on Amazon made by some company you've never heard of $99 - it's a very poor quality product. The handful that I've been asked to use have all made things sound worse, cut in and out or quit working. I highly recommend against them.